Nihilism

The calamities have subsided, the storm has abated. The aftermath however lingers on. What dies can never be reclaimed back to life. No matter how hard you try. It does not matter if you try.

Death. It is both fundamental and ultimate. It is both defeating and empowering. It teaches you to  walk the thin line between hope and despair. It teaches you to stop hoping for the obvious imminent and yet hope for something which was never there.  It is a weird teacher; it first kills you and then teaches you to live anew and afresh. It first shatters you and then teaches you to gather your pieces and sew them again.  It is as paradoxical as it is crushing.

It is an agonizing teacher. It robs you off your sanity and restores it to you when you are irretrievably insane. It is teaches you to try , to no avail, to attempt to clear the cobwebs, wipe away the mist and see the light beyond. You learn in the process that excruciating is a weaker word. It takes years of obscurity before the dawn of final realization. But by then, your heart has stopped hoping for the light and has found comfort in the bleak settings. And you wonder, what is the point of getting something when you have long stopped longing for it? But you forget, that the ‘something ‘had ceased to exist the day it died; or maybe it never was there. It was just a spectre of your mind and perception. And then you realise the futility of your pursuits,all throughout. Nihilism.